Why I Pursued a Higher Education

A woman’s life can really be a sucession of lives, each revolving around some emotionally compelling situation or challenge, and marked off by some intense experience.
  * Wallis Simpson
      Ten years ago I had just graduated highschool, and I felt more than ready for the fascinating new world of adulthood.   I felt that finally, after eighteen years of living by everyone else’s rules, it was my turn!   I knew exactly what I wanted for my life, and I was ready to get it! I dreamed of graduating college with some type of degree in journalism and a healthy salary.   Somewhere along the way, I expected to meet the love of my life, and ride off into forever… where I would raise many children in the comfort of a great marriage in partnership with my perfect husband. Ha!
    If that was my dream, I’ve been rudely awakened by the nightmare of reality. It is 2012, and I have less education than I did when I graduated high school. I’m a twenty- eight year old waitress living in a two- bedroom townhouse that I can barely afford, where I raise my three beautiful without a father’s love or support.
    I could explain how I got to this undesirable situation; however I’ll spare myself the pain of abashment and self- loathing. Instead, I’ll just say that I have taken many wrong turns on the path of my life.   I would make decisions, seemingly trivial, that would lead me down unforeseen paths in which I was completely unprepared for.   Unfortunately, I just kept on going, too proud to realize or admit that I was lost.   Eventually, after many… sometimes brutal shortcomings, I accepted the truth:   I screwed up almost every important adult decision I made. Ouch.
    So what now? What should I do? Should I give up and accept my life as a derogatory failure? Should I just keep going and imminently bury myself in the same hole I’ve been digging all this time? Should I let bitterness and regret consume what is left of my hope and ambition? Should I just excuse myself by blaming...