The Ok Corral in Counselling

THE OK CORRAL IN COUNSELLING….

We looked at the OK Corral within the Counselling framework and the Steve Karpman Drama Triangle. These are interesting concepts where relationships/life positions can be broken up into beliefs about self and others which are used to justify other decisions about ourselves and others and to justify our behaviour.

Within the OK Corral, the four positions are:

I am okay, you are okay (ASSERTIVENESS)
Key statements could include:
I HAVE THE RIGHT TO BE ME, YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO BE YOU

I am not okay, you are okay (PASSIVITY)
Key statements could include:
WHATEVER YOU WANT’S OKAY BY ME
IM WAITING FOR MY LIFE TO GET BETTER
I’M NOT IMPORTANT

I am okay, you are not okay (INDIRECT AGGRESSION)
Key statements could include:
IF I WERE YOU I’D DO THIS
GET OUT OF MY WAY
I DON’T CARE ABOUT YOU

I am not okay, you are not okay (DIRECT AGRESSION)
Key statements could include:
MARTYDOM’S MY WAY OF LIFE
DON’T WORRY I CAN MANAGE
CAN’T YOU TAKE A JOKE
OF COURSE I’M NOT ANGRY

Franklyn Ernst (1971) who established the OK Corral believed that we move around all these positions during a typical day. When the green (top) quadrant is at its strongest, our relationships with others are likely to more effective and positive.


Karpman had the (Drama) triangle which focuses on the three positions:

  1. I’m okay, you’re not ok (Persecutor) – I’ll improve you


Key statements could include:
You should
You must



  2. I’m okay, you’re not ok (Rescuer) – I’ll do it for you


Key statements could include:
  You need
  I’ll fix


  3. I’m not okay, you’re ok (Victim) - Help


Key statements could include:
I’m sorry
I can’t
Poor me

One could say in all three positions responsibility is not taken for themselves.

The fourth position, out of the relationship, is the positive one, that is, I’m ok, you’re okay. In this triangle the three positions change:

  1. I’m okay, you’re not ok (Persecutor)...