The True Relationship

Humanity is looking for a way to make things easier. It is looking for bullet points, and easy to follow steps. I recently read an advertisement for essay submissions on "9 Steps to Win a Lady's Heart". This strikes me as incredibly naive. I do not subscribe to the belief that life can be broken down into a methodical system or intellectual road map. As I sit and think on the title of this submission, I realize that there is not a guide that any one person can give. It does not exist.

I propose instead that success in a relationship must come from a successful relationship with the One who created us. I do not believe that repetition of “step A” will always reap “result B“.   There are always other factors influencing the outcome, to which I’m sure you, the reader, would agree. If I were to say to a man, “If you participate in your community, then women will realize you are a compassionate man and desire you”. What would your reaction be? Surely you would not take me seriously. Why then do we, as men, subconsciously do things like this every day. Why do you wear that favorite shirt that makes you look slimmer every time you go to Sunday morning devotions? Why did you donate money to the orphanage? Was it to improve the plight of the children? Or did you do it to puff up your own image? Was it too add a brag point for the next conversation you have with that cute barista at the coffee shop?

We often look at life through the lens of “how“, instead of the better lens of “why“.   How can I win a woman’s heart? How can I improve my good standing in the community? How will this impact the way my girlfriend sees me? All good questions, but questions that really require a much deeper line of thought. Why do I need to win a woman’s heart is a better question. Why do I need the approval of my community? Why does my girlfriend’s opinion matter? It is only when we delve into questions like these that mankind can discover answers.

The answer lies in a real and passionate...