Indicators of Abuse

What are the signs?

If a woman is forced to change her behaviour because she is frightened of her partner then she is being abused.   If she is experiencing any of the following then it’s likely that she’s being abused:

  * Is he jealous and possessive?
  * Does he cut her off from family and friends and try to isolate her?
  * Is he charming one minute and abusive the next? Does he have sudden changes of mood
  * Does he control her life – for example, her money, who she should see, what she should wear?
  * Does he monitor her movements?
  * Does he blame her for the abuse?
  * Does he humiliate or insult her in front of others?
  * Does he verbally abuse her?
  * Does he constantly criticise her?
  * Does he use anger and intimidation to frighten her and make her comply with his demands?
  * Does he tell her she’s useless and couldn’t cope without him?
  * Has he threatened to hurt her or people close to her if she leaves?
  * Does she change her behaviour to avoid making him angry?
  * Does he force her to have sex when she doesn’t want to?
  * There are many different ways of being abusive. Here are a few examples:
  * Damaging a woman’s possessions
  * Smashing up the furniture
  * Threatening to harm or kill the pets
  * Threatening to kidnap or get custody of the children if she leaves
  * Locking her out of the house during an argument
  * Terrorising her by driving fast or through red lights at high speed because he knows it frightens her
  * The aim of the behaviour, whether conscious or unconscious – is to take control of the woman’s life. Domestic violence is an abuse of power – it’s all about power and control.


  * Depression
  * Poor impulse control
  * Demands constant attention and affection
  * Lack of parental participation and interest
  * Misuse of alcohol/drugs
  * Regularly displays fatigue or listlessness, falls...