I played a promiscuous character and that was hard due to the fact that I've made mistakes in the past and I was scared of being judged but at the same time. I've always been who moved with the wrong crowd, who wanted to be liked everyone so bad that in the process I forgot who I was. I forgot my purpose. I forgot my calling in life. No matter how many mistakes I made I was still determined to be the girl I wanted to be, not who God wanted me to be. In order to fit in I had to be this girl, the girl with a heavy heart, the girl who went down the wrong path.
Unfortunately, this was not an isolated incident, who I was at school was different from who I was at home, which was different than who I was at church. At school I had a foul mouth and was quick to anger then at home I tried to be what my parents wanted me to be and at church I played the good little girl. But one day it caught up with me. Basically, I had splintered into 4 different girl : any given week was like reaching into a hat and pulling out a girl hoping she was the right one for the right time for the right place. It was exhausting living this lie.But balancing all these different person was all I knew how to do. Still, I wasn’t sure how long I could keep this up. But one day, when I was at the youth festival rehearsals, one of the youth young workers   said "This is your time to let go, this is your time to leave the past behind you. You have so many questions but no answers to them. Carrying your past is only destroying you. You need to let go. "In that moment it was like God had spoken directly to me.This was a turning point for me. Growing up I heard that we were designed to live in this relationship with God, but that was not what I was doing. I was searching so desperately for acceptance that I not only lived these multiple lives, but I did things that I knew were wrong. The Bible calls this sin. And this sin was definitely separating me from God. Sin always has a...